Archive for the 'Me' Category

Things to do in Denver when you wish you were dead

August 9, 2007

This week, I’m in the Mile-High City for training on Cisco content switches. As a public service should you ever find yourself in the same scenario, let me tell you how to get to [unnamed tech training facility] in Denver, Colorado.

First, find your rental car in the hotel parking lot, a Chevy HHR (a vehicle that is capable of outrunning only toddlers and the very elderly). Next, apply full acceleration to exit the parking lot and merge with other cars traveling at 30MPH. At this point, begin driving around the city. As you attempt to decipher the map you’ve brought, notice that several streets are named identically except for their suffixes. If you see Johnson St., don’t turn. However, if you see Johnson Rd., make a left. Don’t forget to curse the city planners. Also, don’t forget to accelerate liberally, or you may find yourself moving in reverse, such is the awesome power of the HHR.

Now, after 40 minutes or so and a distance traveled of approximately 2.6 miles, you should arrive at the correct street address for [unnamed tech training facility]. However, instead of [unnamed tech training facility], there will be a large fitness club in its place. You’ll want to sit on the curb outside the fitness club for a few moments retracing your steps, looking for [uttf]’s phone #, and just generally basking in the moment. When you’re unable to find a contact number and you’ve had your fill of curb-sitting, go inside and ask a personal trainer if she knows where [uttf] is located. She’ll tell you that it’s “downstairs“, where downstairs is short for “downstairs, across the parking garage under this building, inside section D of another building (whatever the hell ‘section D’ means), up the elevator, on the 3rd floor”. After another 10 minutes or so, you’ll be sitting in a classroom with 7-8 other folks, all of whom had nowhere near the difficulty you did.

There! Now wasn’t that easy?

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Am I too late?

July 28, 2007

I wasn’t sure if anyone would still be here. See, blogging’s been going on, oh, forever or so now and this is the first effort I’ve made to exist in that space. I thought that everyone may have already grabbed what’s left of their twelve-pack and wobbled home.

Who am I? Well?? No one, really. A developer with some experience. Another guy in the line at Starbucks. All the more unremarkable because I live in the midwestern US and we all know there’s nothing sexy about that. Along with a small team of great folks, I do web.

And, for the handful of you that read this, now I do blog.